Edward Finally Sees What he Means to Bella
by CullenSweepsMeOffMyFeet
Summary: Edward leaving Bella in New Moon finally hears her mind and sees how much she loves him First fan fic one shot


**All Characters belong to Stephanie Meyer I do not own anything at all just wanted to put a little spin on her already amazing story I am sure you can tell I took alot of her lines from the book she is amazing and I ****just wanted to try a different spin on things so I am not claiming that those words are mine. Sorry this is my first attempt at fanfiction be gentle**

"I'm no good for you, Bella. My world is not for you, I don't want you to come with me." I spoke the words slowly and precisely, watching as she absorbed the lies I was feeding her.

_I don't want you to come with me. I don't want you to come with me. He doesn't want me He finally realized what a pathetic human I really am._ _He wasn't sure that he wanted me around that long that's why he refused to change me._

Confusion overtook me I heard her saying these words but her mouth never moved.

"You… don't… want me?"

"No."

_He doesn't want me. He owns my heart how am I supposed to go on without him._

_I don't want to be a source of guilt and anguish in his life. He should be happy, no matter what it cost me._ _I feel so numb. Say something Bella try to look strong. _"Well, that changes things."

Am I hearing Bella's thoughts? I'm not sure what is going on but I need to finish this before I don't have the strength to walk away from her.

"Of course, I'll always love you… in a way. But I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't. Don't do this." _But you already have Edward why are you leaving me behind and breaking my heart what am I going to do without you._ _It never made sense for you to love me._

"You're not good for me, Bella."

_not good enough for you._.

"If… that's what you want."

"Don't worry. You're human time heals all wounds for your kind."

"And your memories?" _The way I feel about you will never change. I love you—and there's nothing you can do about it_ _My throat feels like it is closing I'm choking._

"Well I won't forget. But _my _kind… we're very easily distracted." Images of Rosalie and Tanya floated through her mind Oh Beautiful Bella My angel you will always be the most beautiful thing in my world. she truly believes every lie. Bella baby of all times for me to hear your mind your making my nonexistent heart break even more Bella if you only knew I will spend every day of the rest of my existence regretting that I had to let you go.

_I feel dizzy_ If these are her thoughts they are a swirl of confusion nothing makes sense.

_I need to breathe normally. I need to concentrate, to find a way out of this nightmare. Love, life, meaning… over. _

Of course I couldn't just leave her there I waited up in the trees to make sure she got out of the woods safely. I can't believe her mind is finally open to me she is remembering me in such a light she truly believes I am an angel and not a soulless monster. It's been a couple hours she is just lying there on the forest ground crying and sobbing, her mind tormenting me with every moment I have ever spent with her. Seeing our times together from her memory is killing me. I don't have the resolve to do this.

I swoop down and pick her up and cradle her in my arms she is shivering and sobbing and doesn't even realize I'm here. I need to take her somewhere warm where we can talk about this.

_Edward why is he comforting me while I am being an emotional train wreck If he thinks he can just hold me till I stop than he doesn't understand the pain him not loving me causes me. I feel like there is a giant whole where my heart should be._

"Bella I am taking you home so you can warm up and when we get there we need to talk."

As we get closer to my house the thoughts of my family are screaming at me.

_I told you not to do this to her that neither one of you were strong enough to handle it~ Alice_

_Oh the pain is unbearable how torturous how is she handling that- Jasper_

_Does this mean we get to stay- Emmet_

_Edward lay her down in your room we will go hunting and let you have private time with her- Carlise_

Seeing the pain of the situation through Bella's mind is more that I can stand. "Bella please stop crying my love I need to talk to you."

_Love did he just call me love no I must be imaging things_

"Bella I Did call you love because you are my love please give me a minute to explain myself."

_Wait did I say that out loud?_

"No Bella, you didn't have to I have been able to hear you since we spoke earlier please give me a chance to explain myself."

_Edward can hear me oh my god he can hear me this isn't good he knows how much I am hurting now he will try to stay because he feels guilty_

"Bella, it will never be about guilt. I'm a good liar, I have to be. But still, for you to believe me so quickly. That was…excruciating. You weren't going to let go, I could see that. I didn't want to do it it felt like it would kill me to do it. But I never imagined it would be so easy to do! I thought it would be next to impossible that you would be so sure of the truth that I would have to lie through my teeth for hours to even plant the seed of doubt in your head. I lied, and I'm so sorry—sorry because I hurt you, sorry because it was a worthless effort. I'm sorry. But how could you believe me? After all the thousand times I've told you I love you, how could you let one word break your faith in me? I could see it in your eyes, that you honestly _believed _that I didn't want you anymore not to mention your thoughts. The most absurd, ridiculous concept—as if there were any way that _I _could exist without needing _you_! I love you. I _have _always loved you, and I _will _always love you. When I told you that I didn't want you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy."

"Then Why?"

"I only left you in the first place because I wanted you to have a chance at a normal, happy, human life. If I hadn't thought you would be better off, I could have never make myself leave. I'm much too selfish. Only _you _could be more important than what I wanted… what I needed. What I want and need is to be with you, and I know I'll never be strong enough to leave again."

"Don't promise me anything,"

"Bella I never really left I was waiting in the forest to make sure you would get home okay, Even than I didn't plan on going far I was going to be by your side while you moved on and lived, I could never truly leave you.

_He is just saying this because he feels bad for me _

"No Isabella Marie Swan I Love you and I want forever with you I will change you right now if that's what it takes for you to believe me."

_What he couldn't possibly want me forever just plain ordinary Bella_

You never did see yourself very clearly love.

_That's right he can still hear me we have to figure out how to fix that if he really is willing to stay_

"Bella I don't understand why I was given the gift of hearing your mind tonight maybe it was fates cruel way of making me see that leaving you was a mistake. But I swear to you if you will still have me I will never leave you again. I want to marry you someday and I want to spend an eternity showing you my love for you please find it in your heart to forgive me."

_Is he__

"Bella? I can't hear you any more you have to talk out loud."

"Oh, Edward! Please never do that to me again I need you." As she throws her beautiful delicate arms around my neck and hugs me I know this is the woman who was made for me.


End file.
